Oh Canada

"I [paddled] a map of Canada (including Lake Ontario). Oh Canada."

(With thanks to Joni Mitchell and A Case of You.)

The map shows my 9000km cross-Canada canoe route. I have spent a lot of time learning this country slowly - at about 5km/hour in my canoe! The picture below was taken on the international border in the spectacular paddling area known as Quetico/Boundary Waters, where the world's longest undefended border can be experienced on a portage.

Canoe on my shoulders, one foot walking in the United States and one in Canada. Two countries that shaped me, separated by a made-up line on very real, and often buggy, muddy, and somehow uphill both ways, portages.

We moved from small-town Parry Sound to Atlanta, Georgia, when I was nine, and back home when I was twelve. Quite the culture shock in the 1980s. Ghetto blasters and break dancing were a thing. I witnessed some of it but was too young to understand the coolness I was seeing.

I remember the hush that fell over the Burger King when a man walked in wearing a white robe with a white pointy hat hanging down his back. I learned to say “huh” instead of “eh.” My first concert was Ray Charles at Stone Mountain, singing 'Georgia on My Mind'.

Years later, the States shaped me again. In the second year of my undergrad, I read Jasper Hunt's 'Ethical Issues in Experiential Education'. It captivated my brain. So I went to Minnesota State University to do my master's and learn from him, finding Professors Julie and Scott along the way. I learned about epistemology and was so excited I could barely sleep for a month. I managed the ropes course and have a vivid memory of taking down the ropes after a big program with Aretha Franklin's Respect blasting from Julie's truck.

Then I drove 20,000 kilometres around North America looking for where I wanted to do my PhD. I found the University of New Hampshire and its powerhouse female philosophers. How lucky was I to study there? My cohort created DAMN - our Dissertation Alliance Motivation Network. I lived on Swains Lake. I paddled with Laurie Gullion and Deb Sugerman and fangirled hard - they were paddling and writing icons of mine. There were magical New England falls when Jon would come to visit, and then our first year of marriage there. Two-for-one breakfasts in Durham. Coffee shops in Newmarket and Dover. Sea kayaking and lobster in Maine. Leading Adirondack canoe trips.

I've visited every state except Hawaii and, somehow, South Dakota. I've spent about four months total hiking and paddling through Utah. Jon and I drove 16,000 kilometres to Big Bend and back, swimming with manatees in Florida and watching more than 700 sea turtles released in Texas.

So when I tell you I love the States and that it has shaped me, I really mean it. It's part of why I am who I am. And it's home to so many people I love and worry about these days. But no matter how much heart I have for the red, white and blue, I will always be on my feet for Canada.

Because that long undefended border between friends has a wall now. Not the physical kind. Something harder to see, something almost (or most definitely) spiritual. A 'you threatened our sovereignty' wall. A 'this isn't okay' wall.

I haven't set foot in a country I love since January 2025. I don't know when, or if, I will again.

Instead, I examine grocery-store labels. I get my peaches from Ontario, not Georgia. My favourite way to buy Canadian is to drive down the Centre Road in McKellar to Beaver Creek Farm and buy what is quite simply the best bread I've ever tasted. Close to home.

I do see a silver lining in this big mess south of us. Canada is a bit like a dysfunctional family. We argue. We disagree about who we are and who we should become. We get mad at each other. And then somebody threatens the family and we remember. "Oh. Right."

"These are my people."

"This is my place."

"We've got each other's backs."

I love America. I think I always will. It gave me people and places and ideas that changed the course of my life.

But Canada? As Joni sang,

"You're in my blood like holy wine...

I remember that time you told me

You said, Love is touching souls

Surely, you've touched mine

'cause part of you pours out of me

In these lines from time to time.

I could drink a case of you [Canada] and still be on my feet"